“Fire Marshal Bill” Inspects Wilmington’s Grand Opera House

By WILLIAM C. HITCHCOCK
March 1993, Big Shout Magazine

James Carrey initially sounds so normal he could be the back-up man for your dentist’s Wednesday afternoon golf foursome.

But midway through any given sentence, a peal of laughter will break through, and his voice will transform him into someone else — maybe a screechy teenager, a steroid-pumped female body builder, or some other tortured soul from Hell.

Another string of giggles and he’ll turn right back to normal.

Probably best known as the only white guy of Fox Network’s In Living Color, Carrey started out as a celebrity impersonator like fellow Canadian Rich Little.

In early 1984, Carrey starred as the straight man in an ill-fated situation comedy called Duck Factory that lasted a mere 13 weeks. He has also co-starred in such memorable films as Once Bitten, Peggy Sue Got Married, and Earth Girls Are Easy.

Fortunately, Carrey was noticed by Damon Wayans during an impromptu stand-up gig in L.A., and now we all get to have visits from the people who inhabit Carrey’s world.

This average-looking white guy and his multiple personalities will visit Wilmigton’s Grand Opera House for two shows on March 13 at 7 p.m. and 9:30 p.m.

Big Shout: Thanks for getting up early in the morning for me.

James Carrey: I’m not up. I’m in my big fluffy bed somewhere in Hollywood.

(Beep)

BS: That’s the beep you’ll hear every 15 seconds.

JC: And what’s that for?

BS: That’s off an answering machine. Is it all right if I record this?

JC: Sure… I like that beep. It reminds me of when you had to turn the page or go to the next slide in school.

(Beep)
(Guffaws from both ends of the line)

BS: Well, you’re Canadian and that’s a little different.

JC: I certainly am.

BS: What’s the difference between growing up here and there? What did you see as funny?

JC: Nothing. Nothing was funny in Canada (laughs). No, it was just cold and I wanted out. The last three years I lived there I used to go outside during the dead of winter in huge drifts of snow — I would have my Converse on and a sweater. I was just rebelling against the cold…

BS: … Which doesn’t work very well. When do you remember thinking to yourself, “Hey, I’m funny. I can get paid for doing this?”

JC: Forever. Always. Since I was a little, tiny baby. I used to sit in my high chair before I could even speak, and when I didn’t want to eat, I would shake uncontrollably until everyone was laughing and the food got cold. I was literally always like this. So I can’t ever remember… well, for a week I wanted to be a vet. A veterinarian (laughs), not a war vet.

BS: Have you always had the faces? Have you always been able to do that, or did you have to work on it?

JC: Again, that’s something I’ve always done. Sometimes I used to spend hours looking in the mirror, just making faces and stuff. My mother would say, “Jim Carry, if you don’t stop looking in the mirror, you’re going to see the devil.” And I thought, “Wow, this is great.” So I kept looking and I got myself a black cloak with a hood, but nothing happened.

BS: You started out as a celebrity impersonator. Did you ever have anybody call you on one and say, “Hey, don’t do me no more?”

JC: (Laughs) Actually, I just did one recently on the Lori David Hair Treatment. I did Lori Davis. Immediately after it, Cher sent some of the Lori Davis products and a little letter with it saying, “Dear, Jim, Kiss my ass. Cher.”

BS: (Laughs) Did you try the products at least?

JC: My wife tried them (in a grossed out teenagers voice) “They’re greasy.” But then after I did the Juice Man, he called me and he was very excited. He was very happy to be recognized as a human being. He just went on and on for a long time. (In an old Jewish man’s voice) “Is it sweepin’ the countryside, Jim?” That kind of stuff. He was really funny. Then he proceeded to tell me how the only thing I missed was that he has an insatiable desire for sex.

BS: Oh, boy.

JC: And that he chases his young wife around all the time. He says his wife’s underwear makes the best juice.

BS: Lovely. What’s it like working with the Wayans family?

JC: They’re all gone now. They all left. Damon left and they all started to die a little. They’re like the twins in that movie Dead Ringers. When one of them is doing well, the rest of them think they’re just as talented.

BS: Are they a very close family?

JC: They’re very close — they can’t live without each another. When Damon left, Keenan shaved his head and sat in a dark room. I’d say, “Keenan, wake up. It’s show time.” He’d be just sittin’ there going, “Oh, well whatever.” So, they all had to move on.

BS: What’s it like being the only white guy on the show?

JC: It’s okay, if you know how to fight and use a knife. No…

BS: Or how about being the only Canadian there?

JC: That’s even worse. These guys don’t even know how to skate!

BS: No Bobby Orr knee jokes? “Bobby who?”

JC: It’d just fall on deaf ears. It’d be great if I could spin a puck on my finger, but it’s just not happening. It’s totally not cool. I used to think about that when I first got on the show — “What’s it going to be like?” But I haven’t thought about it since the second week of shooting. It’s just a funny show and funny people.

BS: Where do the people like Vera and Fire Marshal Bill come from? Where are you finding them?

JC: Hell. I go to Hell every night, and… No, they come different ways. Vera was somebody I ran into at Gold’s Gym.

BS: Oh, Jesus.

JC: (In a muscle dude’s voice) “When I was getting buff.” I just walked behind this woman who was just a mountain and she said (Vera’s voice) “I’ll have one of those protein shakes.” And I walked out of there with a character.

She didn’t have the pigtails and the hairy under arms — that was my little exaggeration. Fire Marshal Bill started out as the half-flesh man. He was the guy who worked as the medical dummy up at the university. The guy who models for the medical journals. Half his body is muscle and sinew and stuff. And his genitalia is removable. His wife is real happy about that when he goes on those long business trips.

BS: What do you want to do next?

JC: I’ve got some movies coming up. One is called Ace Ventura, Pet Detective, or Pet Dick for short. I play a down-and-out pet detective whose main thing is finding peoples’ cats and dogs. He gets his big break when the Miami Dolphins mascot dolphin is kidnapped three days before the Superbowl. It’s gonna be real out there. I’m going to be torn apart by birds, eaten by sharks.

BS: Are you enjoying being back on the road doing stand up?

JC: Oh, I love it. It’s my favorite thing. It’s groovy because you don’t have to pass anything through a censor or anything like that. It’s a blast. I love it. I’m Freedom Man.

I’ll be doing a lot of jousting (for the shows). I’ll be in full armor with a big stick running at the audience.